Being new in town, though, and in need of Cornwall friends, I’ve definitely taken on more than I can keep up. Promise me, however vaguely, that it might be ‘a good way to meet people’ and I have always been there. It’s just that it’s a lot. I do tap dance on Mondays, yoga on Tuesdays, roller derby also on Tuesdays, choir on Wednesdays, paddleboarding any time of the week… I basically do more extra-curricular activities than some middle class five-year-olds whose parents already set their sights on them going to Cambridge.… Read More The joy of saying ‘no’
Have you ever seen a Christmas tree go up in flames? If not, I highly recommend it. In many ways it’s similar to the time at university when I accidentally leaned into a candle, in that there’s a bright flash of fire and a really loud fizzing sound. Of course, with the Christmas tree the… Read More Twelfth Night, or Let’s All Burn Christmas To The Ground
She blew down the trees,
And she carved up the beaches,
But I didn’t feel it
Because of my breeches.
Cocooning my legs
Like a black plastic shroud,
You protected my jeans
From the contents of clouds.… Read More An ode to my waterproof trousers
I’ve caught myself looking back on 2017 a few times recently and thinking I don’t feel like I’ve achieved much. It’s normally when I’m on my way to work, because small midlife crises are exactly what Monday mornings are for. And then I realise that I’ve left my Cornwall flat to walk to my Cornwall office where I do the new job I didn’t have this time last year and then I realise that a couple of things might have changed after all.… Read More Let’s all pretend we care about each other’s resolutions for a minute
Let’s be honest, it’s Christmas and if it’s not Quality Street or two-day-old turkey that’s never been in the fridge who really cares? But it’s also the end of a year in which some things have happened that deserve a mention. Or they probably don’t but my brain is a Ferrero Rocher now.… Read More Things that happened to me this year that you don’t care about because why would you?
when I left the shop and walked away, I bumped (almost literally) into something like fifty santas in Falmouth high street. Their costumes ranged from the detailed to the actually-I’ll-just-wear-my-red-dressing-gown-because-that’ll-do, but they pretty much all carried drums. They’d stopped to sing a few verses of a Christmas carol, but they soon started drumming and marching up the high street.
I followed them because, well, they were Santas and I have Christmas in my heart and soul forever. … Read More The Saturday Falmouth went batshit
Famously, I lost my shit a few months ago over a single shooting star, so I feel like we all know how the walk home went. My initial disappointment at seeing clouds in the sky broke up as fast as they did. Stars started to move. I made some very loud ‘ooh’ noises, completely ignoring the fact that people in pretty, probably-not-double-glazed houses were trying to sleep. Then I staggered home like a drunk person because I was looking up at the sky the entire way. Which was fine, because I only nearly died twice.… Read More Fake space and real space are great